It’s Always Been A Good Place, You Two

I Love You, Andy & Imogen

We were in a good place, Andy’s parents' cabin in Truckee. It wasn’t too late, but we’d already had dinner. Dusty, Andy, Imogen and I were working on our drinks after spending a good bit of time outside, smoking cigarettes and drinking beer as the blizzard came on in the middle of spring break. As night came we were inside, stoned and drunk, playing Settlers of Catan. Catan is a game of conquest, with the goal being to acquire the most roads, colonies and ports on the island of Catan. It was my first time playing and I was excited but a little nervous. At the time the only two things I heard about the game were that it could last a long time and that people get into genuine arguments and fights about it. People, for some reason I was about to find out, become nearly possessed by the game and are dedicated to winning. Because of this my tactic (as it now almost always is unless I accidentally start winning) was to build a long road and share the beer my people, the Hobbits, made with the rest of the residents of Catan. In short, I wanted to build the longest road. 

The game started off fine, no one really getting frustrated, but as the pieces began to crowd the board, the more we drank and smoked, it became clear that Dusty was going to win, and that the bickering of trading would be pivotal. Seeing as I’ve never been that good at bartering, I just sat there, slowly getting tipsy and enjoying the three of them arguing while the Hobbits carried on trying to share their joys of fine ale with the wilds of this island. Eventually, there was a shortage of some resources on the island and Andy had most of the access to it. Dusty was clearly close to winning and, seeing this, Imogen wanted to stop this and give herself a better advantage. So, as Dusty offered a decent trade, Imogen offered a more lucrative one—more sheep and iron or something like that. After much arguing, Andy decided to go with Dusty, at which point Imogen, frustrated that Andy didn’t take her offer, his girlfriend and the one from my faint memory who had more cards to offer, got up and stormed off, pissed at the trade. Dusty and I, kind of shocked, just sat there as Andy got up to find Imogen in their room.

I remember listening to them genuinely fight about the game of Catan at a pitch that made me wonder if it might escalate into some greater argument about their relationship.  I remember thinking, is Catan gonna break them apart? But no, it didn’t. After a little while of talking about it, they came back to the table, Imogen apologizing for the outburst. Imogen, still clearly mad at Andy but having forgiven him for what he did, the game went on. I was amazed. Here they were, playing the game, lightly heckling each other, until Dusty did eventually win, at which point Imogen could prove that she was right (as often is the case with Imogen). But Andy accepted he was wrong, and laughed. 

Since then I’ve seen them argue over big and small stuff. The two of them are both stubborn, full of well thought out opinions and reasons which are hard for either to debunk or completely shoot down. They are always ready to question each other. But what amazed me that day as what still amazes me is their willingness to take on the fight, the conflict, to bring it out of each other, but never let it end there, at the fight. In some way they return to their love, and their love makes it certain they can feel comfortable in the fight. It’s a magical thing I rarely see in relationships, and one of the biggest reasons why I think they are still together, just over a decade now, and barely over a week hitched.

Like that trip, an unexpected storm occurred in the middle of their wedding, right during the ceremony. Our homie Jordan said the forecast looked like a middle finger pointing right at the wedding. But they got a tent at the last minute for the venue. As it dumped buckets of rain it seemed to only add something special to the wedding, matching well the theme of their friend Bennet’s speech on chaos, the universe and Star Trek. We ate at tables with Imogen’s space logs. They danced their first dance to “I Must Be In A Good Place Now” by Louisiana’s Bobby Charles. Then we danced with them. It was a wedding, and it was beautiful. To see lives choose each other is magic. There’s little more to say than that because the feeling is beyond articulations of any form.

I can’t remember what year that Tahoe trip to Andy’s parent’s cabin was, but my guess is 2014. Andy and Imogen had been dating maybe a year or so by then, but I’m shaky on the details, just as I’m sure I will be on the day of their wedding, though Andy’s vows made me cry and Imogen’s made me giddy with how long she’d harbored her crush on him and the night made me feel so comfortably beautiful, surrounded by so many loved ones, and friend’s of theirs whose names I didn’t catch. I’m sure I’ll forget the day, but I won’t forget the rain, the brass, the love, the space logs. I won’t be able to forget them because it was the moment when those two got to say to us all, to their little wonderful world, they’re in a good place now.

Space Log